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Nowhere to Run
The ridiculous life of a semi-professional football club chairman
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30 b
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Brought to you by Penguin.On the second oldest football pitch in the world, Jonathan Sayer stands atop a beer crate to address the assembled fans of Ashton United FC. As his initial optimism and disillusionment begin to slip through his fingers, the new co-chairman and co-owner (alongside his dad) starts to realise the scale of the challenge ahead.Battling to keep the club afloat, a record number of games without a win sees hope turn to despair as Jonathan contends with a mutiny from a group of octogenarian supporters, constant battles with the local council and a star striker who arrives on crutches despite somehow passing his medical.As the on-pitch form continues to deteriorate and rifts appear between him and his father, Jonathan begins to make some increasingly desperate decisions: dressing as a seven-foot robin in the local market in an effort to drum up larger crowds, sinking his savings into an ever spiralling wage bill and even contemplating bringing in a local priest to lift the 'Boxing Day Curse' by performing a late-night exorcism on the pitch.Chronicling the euphoric highs and bitter disappointments of the less glamourous side of the beautiful game, Nowhere to Run is the hilarious, heart-warming tale of life in the hot seat of a non-league football club.(c)2023 Jonathan Sayer (P)2023 Penguin Audio
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